Yesterday and today: November 2010 to April 2011

 














Life as it is today, April 18, 2011

On November 29, 2010, I was diagnosed with Leukemia - ALL - acute lymphoblastic leukemia. My life from that time to today has changed 100%. The focused artist I once was is now focused on getting through each of my chemo blasts at UCSF, enduring some of the side effects and dealing with the snail pace of continuing with my treatment. I have had five varying series of chemo treatments since my initial diagnosis in November.
 
Last night I returned from my latest series. Side effects were minimal and it was only a week visit. I am grateful for these short visits. I now question the doctors frequently with requests to go home. Sound childish? Amazing how you revert when being kept inside for too long. I welcome my escapes / break-outs from U.C.: I can sleep in my own bed,, no 2am vitals, no 5am weigh-ins, no connection to pumps or the “ball and chain “ pole thingy you are connected to and privacy! Being home is heavenly!!

I am trying to live by the 12 Step Credo, “One Day at a Time.” Unfortunately when you’ve been poked, prodded, pumped more times than you’d like to say, it is not so easy. Bad days mixed in with good days are common. I am incredibly anxious, impatient about finishing my chemo regimen. I believe I have 4 more treatments to go. The way I feel today, the day after returning from treatment, I might as well have 40 treatments.

I am a strong woman. I will get through this. I want to have many. many years left to enjoy my children, grandchildren and my husband. I want to buy a second home in New Orleans. I want my artwork to thrive and grow. I am grateful now for what I have in my life but I want more of it. This is what propels me through these chemo treatments. Am I frightened by all of this? Of course. I’m terrified the chemo won’t work. I’m living with these fears in the hope that my determination, love of my family and friends will steer me to a healthy life. Time will tell. I remain hopeful and forever impatient to see where this takes me. Through this all, life is very good.

Back to hospital - NO! SOMArts Pop-Up Shop (today), YES!

I was supposed to return to the hospital this past Friday for a four day stay. My husband began calling for me on Friday to find out when I should check in. The charge nurse said there was no room available and that there hadn't been one available since Thursday. "Call back on Saturday." Saturday we called and we were told that there would be no rooms available until Monday. Okay. The nurse at U.C. was very apologetic, saying this hadn't happened before.

What to do?

Enjoy two more days at home. In fact I signed up for an open house / pop-up store at SOMArts. My husband Gary was going to work it for me. The big surprise was that I could be there too. I haven't done a show since November and I'm honestly excited about this. Since I haven't been able to get into the studio for painting or working with upcycled items, I'll be showing mostly jewelry - rings, necklaces and earrings. I also created some handmade greeting cards, original watercolor paintings, of calavera burlesque women dressed in various sexy attire. Very fun if I do say so myself.

If by chance you're in the area, here's the details on the SOMArts show:

By the by....

Haven't posted any new pics of work I've done lately. Since my time is spent mostly at home and in the hospital, I've taken to working on jewelry. Its so much easier to transfer around from one place to the next. Painting, sanding, transferring images just doesn't make for a easy use in a hospital room. Here's a peek at some of my latest jewelry designs.

MY WORK WILL BE AVAILABE AT THE SOMArts Open House & Pop-Up Shop

SOMArts Open House & Pop-Up Shop

For the first time, in about four months, I'm going to have some of my jewelry and accessories on sale at this SOMArts pop-up shop this coming Sunday. I'm thrilled. Lots of one-of-a-kind items will be available all for $25.00 or under. AMAZING! Although I won't be there in attendance (going back into the hospital tomorrow for a four day stay) my work will be for sale. If you are in the city or will be in the city on Sunday, please stop by. Besides the pop-up shop, all of SOMArts will be open for an open house with activities listed below. Stop by!
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Sunday, April 10, 2011 - 2:00 pm to 4:00 pm | Cost: FREE
SOMArts | 934 Brannan Street
San Francisco, CA


SOMArts Open House & Pop Up Shop | SoMaSOMArts opens its doors for a Sunday of art, food and entertainment. Stroll through the community garden, grab lunch from a local food cart, take a free origami class, free yoga class and buy artwork ranging from $5 to $25.

Open House Workshop and Demonstration Schedule

2:00-2:30 Origami with Jeremy Shafer of Bay Area Rapid Folders
2:30–3:00 Chrysalis Studio Printmaking Demonstration with Katie Gilmartin
3:00–3:30 Darkroom Q&A with Rene and Tom of Sixth Street Photography
3:30–4:00 Yoga Meditation led by Crystal Nelson in the SOMArts Dance Studio AND Origami with Jeremy Shafer of Bay Area Rapid Folders
4:00–4:30 Chrysalis Studio Printmaking Demonstration with Katie Gilmartin
4:30–5:00 Darkroom Q&A with Rene and Tom of Sixth Street Photography
5:00–5:30 Yoga Meditation led by Crystal Nelson in the SOMArts Dance Stu

A night out with friends and ancestors:

me, Maria Sanchez, Alejandra Palos, Roxanne Quezada Chartouni

Compañía Mazatlán Bellas Artes

Compañía Mazatlán Bellas Artes

Compañía Mazatlán Bellas Artes

Compañía Mazatlán Bellas Artes

Had a night out with my hubby Gary and 3 girlfriends: Maria, Roxanne and Alejandra. All artists we create paintings, sculpture and photography. A wonderful mixture of talent. A wonderful night out seeing the Olmec exhibit http://deyoung.famsf.org/deyoung/exhibitions/olmec-colossal-masterworks-ancient-mexico at the de Young Museum in Golden Gate Park. Along with the fab exhibit were the dancing genius of Azteca dance troupe Danza Xitlalli and Folklorico dance troupe Compañía Mazatlán Bellas Artes de Sacramento. What a great night. It felt so good to be out again with hubby and friends. Happy to be strong enough to have a night out!

~ Martha

Its Jewelry Time - Enough Already - Let's get back to work

Okay, so I've been diagnosed with a major illness and have another 5 months or so of treatment. Heard this tirade over and over again. At my last hospital visit, I decided it was time to get back to doing something artistic again. Painting in a hospital room is not such an easy feat. There is just too much to clean up after yourself. I decided to go back to my roots: jewelry making, beading, whatever you want to call it. Hubby Gary went to the studio and picked up beads, wire, tools, findings and I got to work. Boy, my hands were just itching to get busy again. The first day, I shooed the nurses and doctors out of my room as soon as possible so I could get back to work. All of them seemed surprised that I had something I could create while passing the time. My thought was you need to expand your circle of friends if you don't know anyone with artistic interests. My hospital room became a one room operation. I made earrings, rings and necklaces. With my new Canon camera (Christmas present from Gar) I photographed them. Using my lap top, I edited the photos. Finally, I posted them on Etsy and waited for sales. Believe it or not, the sales actually came. I even had my first sale from France just a few days ago. I guess my research in finding the right ingredients to put together my jewelry has paid off. One thing you have a lot of time for while in the hospital, is doing research.

Honestly, I hate all this time I'm having to spend in and out of the hospital. Beyond that, I'm enjoying using the time to research and create. Life is hard but sometimes you figure out how to make it better. I'm trying to stay creative in all walks of life.

Today is the beginning of my first week at home. I'll be home for two weeks. The sun is finally shining again. The orange walls of my house are shining bright. The sky is a beautiful hue of blue. There are some white puffy clouds hanging over the hills and bay. Its beautiful out there. Life isn't perfect but it could be way worse. I'm hanging on and hoping to make things better.

~ Martha
p.s. photo above is pic I took about a month ago while visiting Fort Point under the San Francisco side of the Golden Gate bridge - what can I say...I live in a beautiful town!

Lessons from Dad

My Dad, Jacob or Jake as he was known, was a celebrity, star in his own world. Funny, kind, positive, he used these qualities as a great story teller, singer and leader at his church. He attracted friends from all walks of life. Once you met Jake, you would never forget him. He was always ready for a good conversation and always interested in who you were.

Despite his positive disposition, Dad lived his life faced with various health issues. When he was a young man, working at San Jose Hospital, he agreed to help a friend move a piano. The piano slipped and broke his back. He was constantly in pain throughout his life from this injury and often had to receive surgery to relieve the discomfort. His life in his later years involved ailments associated with aging. My Dad was basically always in and out of hospitals. It was a way of life.

As a child, I didn't feel his hospital visits were particularly unusual or even frightening. My mother always presented his hospitalization as something normal. We'd go off to the hospital to visit. Once there, Dad always seemed to be holding court: greeting doctors, nurses and other co-workers with a smile on his face. As a child all I could see was that he wasn't frightened by the medical care he was receiving and he was surrounded by friends. Not a bad environment to be in.

As he became older, his relationship with his doctors grew more into friendships with a personal touch given to the type of care he received. My Dad never lost his ability to treat the hospital as his second home. His ailments grew more serious with age but he always had a ready smile and a greeting for a friend.

My Dad lived until the age of 87. He had quite a long life. With my recent diagnosis of Leukemia, I have felt his memory so close to me. There have been times that I physically felt his presence - almost in an embrace. It seems Dad has called on me to remember his strategies of dealing with health issues: face them don't fear them, do what is possible to overcome them, ask questions when needed and make friends with your community at the hospital.

It is my turn to create my community while in the hospital. The biggest surprise has been my ability to "channel" Dad while in the hospital. I know the names of doctors, nurses and other hospital staff. I chat with everyone. I question without alienating and manage to get through various procedures without getting hysterical. I'm a good patient - just as the nurses always said about Dad.

Dad prepared me for this journey. He gave me skills to deal with the multitude of treatments I have yet to receive. He showed me how to be fearless while facing overwhelming circumstances. He taught me how to create a nurturing environment, away from home and in a sterile medical environment. Love and caring exist in many odd places and I'm happy to say that Dad helped me find it here and now.

Thank-you Dad for being such a great teacher. I had no idea there were more lessons to be learned from you even after your departure from this world.

I miss you and love you,
Martita